Severe Imposter Syndrome
Reflections From Last Saturday
Situation On a whim, I entered the US Rowing Indoor National Rowing Championships (virtual). I thought it would be cool to challenge myself.
Problem I am not a competitive rower.
Review
9.53am PST – “what the heck am I doing here? I have no place being in this race.
9.54am PST – “you’ve got this. You’ve done the work (some training). Ok, get ready and give it your best.”
9.55am PST – Attention, Get set, ROW! “We’re off, four good strokes to get going and hold that pace.”
These were the exact thoughts and narratives swirling through my mind last Saturday morning as I participated in the US Rowing Indoor National Championships.
From the comfort of my home, I was connected via the internet, competing against 33 other age group rowers across the US on my Concept 2 indoor rower.
There’s a reason why the indoor rower is one of the least used pieces of equipment in gyms: it is painful. The universal benchmark distance, whether you are Olympic or Club level, is 2,000 meters. Your 2k time is the key metric of ability off the water. On Saturday, there was a 2k and 500m option. I opted for the longer appointment with pain and entered the 2k.
Minutes before the race start, I experienced a bout of imposter syndrome. “I’m not a rower, I’ve never been in a club, I’ve never rowed in a scull or an eight.” All true, however, these thoughts would not serve me in this moment. Nor would focusing on the other 33 age groupers, many of whom were Club Rowers, Cross-Fitters or fitness enthusiasts ready to crush it [or crush me].
It was time for a mindset shift. Get your head straight and the butterflies flying in formation. The self-narrative changed to intentional and positive. “You row 4-5 times per week.” [check] “You rowed over 300k in December closing the year well.” [check] “You got this!” [check].
A lighter more playful and optimistic narrative emerged. I went from a reactive fear-based place to a more creative place. More composure, more playfulness, more courage. The inner critic was silenced.
This parallels the journey of many leaders when they consciously use the Leadership Circle framework to guide their thoughts and actions UP the CIRCLE from reactive to creative.
Did I finish? What was the result?
Much better than I ever expected – I came 9th out of 33. The original goal was not to come last! I went from imposter to very solid age group rower. I focused on the inputs I could control. My thoughts shifted from fear based reactive to optimistic, positive creative. This guided my actions: powerful strokes, consistent rhythm, red-line race pace and breath control. The combination led to a tremendous outcome with a top ten placing. Final time 7mins 33 seconds.
Whether in sport, business, leadership or any facet of life, it all starts with mindset. There’s nothing to stop you from thinking about stepping into the better version of you. You might surprise yourself with the result.